The conference was billed as the largest and most influential gathering of conservatives in the world, Stephen Colbert said on Monday. “That’s if you don’t count their last gathering” at the Capitol.
0
Tag Archives: The Tonight Show (TV Program)
Seth Meyers Is Excited to See Trump’s Tax Returns
Meyers said it shouldn’t be hard for the Manhattan D.A. to find a crime in “the tax records of a guy who claims to be a billionaire, yet paid only $750 in federal income taxes when he was president.”
0
Late Night Laughs Off Mike Pence’s Renewed Loyalty to Trump
“I don’t know where the line is between forgiving and being a doormat, but Mike Pence crossed it a long time ago,” Trevor Noah said.
0
Stephen Colbert Didn’t Realize America Had Been Canceled
“Although I’m not surprised — the last season was pretty unbelievable,” Stephen Colbert said of CPAC’s 2021 theme: “America Uncanceled.”
0
Late Night Blasts Ted Cruz’s Post-Cancún Photo Op
“On Saturday, he posted photos of himself handing out bottled water with the hashtag ‘Texas strong.’ Sure, dude, we totally believe you,” Seth Meyers joked on Monday.
0
Jimmy Kimmel Knows How the Impeachment Sequel Will End
“It’s kind of like ‘The Empire Strikes Back,’” Kimmel said. “We already know how it ends, but we’re watching it anyway.”
0
Stephen Colbert Gets Serious About New Insurrection Evidence
“Because only by facing this truth will we have any hope of stopping it from happening again,” Colbert said. “Also, I’m pretty convinced it wasn’t antifa now.”
0
Trump’s Trial: Stephen Colbert Experiences ‘Déjà Coup’
Donald Trump’s second impeachment trial kicked off on Tuesday with late-night hosts predicting it will end just like the first.
0
Trevor Noah: Marjorie Taylor Greene Deleted Her Browser History IRL
The congresswoman disavowed some of her outlandish statements. But Noah says she’s “so crazy that her saying that 9/11 happened makes me go, ‘Wait, did it?’”
0
Trevor Noah Loves Seeing Newsmax Shook
The “Daily Show” host said the threat of a defamation lawsuit forced anchors at the right-wing news site into “behaving like actual journalists.”
0
Trump’s Being Impeached Again, So It Must Be Groundhog Day
“His lawyers just copied and pasted his defense from the last impeachment: Control-F ‘Ukraine,’ replace with ‘riot,’” Jimmy Fallon said.
0
Trump’s New Lawyers Represent Him Well, Says Late Night
“My God, who on Earth would hire Jeffrey Epstein’s defense lawyer?” Stephen Colbert said on Monday. “Oh, Jeffrey Epstein’s wingman? Yeah, that makes sense.”
0
Jimmy Kimmel Thinks Marjorie Taylor Greene Needs an Education
“If you don’t know who this person is, I wish I didn’t, too,” Kimmel said of the QAnon enthusiast who’s been named to the House Education and Labor Committee.
0
Stephen Colbert Is Thrilled to Have a President With a Plan
“Yesterday, President Biden announced a dramatic change to America’s Covid plan: There is one,” Colbert said on Wednesday.
0
Late Night Just Can’t Quit Trump
If America can’t move on until the second impeachment trial is over, then neither can Stephen Colbert and his colleagues.
0
Late Night Is Unswayed by Republicans’ Excuses
Trevor Noah says the end of Donald Trump’s term is no reason not to impeach him: “If you get fired at Best Buy, they don’t just let you steal a TV on the way out.”
0
Late Night Weighs In on Biden’s First Day on the Job
It’s never easy, “especially when you’re the new manager and the last guy got called into H.R. for inappropriate workplace treasoning,” Stephen Colbert said.
0
Samantha Bee Welcomes America’s ‘Brand-New Very Old President’
Bee and other hosts were relieved to see the Trump years finally end. “So that’s what it feels like when you’re not grinding your teeth,” Seth Meyers said.
0
Late Night Reflects on the Legacy of ‘He Who Shall Remain Shameless’
Inauguration Eve is “the day before the day we’ve all been waiting for,” Stephen Colbert said on Tuesday night.
0
Late Night Celebrates the Final 36 Hours of Trump in Charge
“Normally, after a president’s term, they show before and after photos to prove how much the job aged him. This time, they’re showing before and after photos of all of us,” Jimmy Fallon joked on Monday.
0
Late Night: Shocker. Trump Stiffs Giuliani and Won’t Take His Calls.
“Impeachment was great, but there really is no more perfect way for this to end than Trump stiffing Rudy,” Seth Meyers said.
0
Late Night Reviews ‘Trump’s Impeachment: The Sequel’
“Makes sense — this president loves having seconds,” Stephen Colbert said on Wednesday.
0
Jimmy Fallon: Mike Pence Just Can’t Win With Trump Fans
“It’s a tough choice for Pence: Invoke the 25th and have MAGA nation hate you, or refuse and still have MAGA nation hate you,” Fallon said.
0
Late Night Is a Bit Concerned About Trump’s Last Nine Days
Jimmy Kimmel wants him out, but admits that “usually when the Senate tries to ram something through that quickly, it’s a conservative Supreme Court justice.”
0
Late Night Is Unimpressed by Titanic-Fleeing Republicans
“Resigning with two weeks left feels less like some moral stand and more like leaving early to beat traffic,” Jimmy Fallon said of the departing officials.
0
Stephen Colbert Goes ‘Unexpectedly Live’
“It’s a horrifying day that will go down in U.S. history, however much longer that is,” Colbert said after President Trump incited a mob of his supporters to storm the Capitol.
0
Late Night Wonders if Mike Pence Will Stand by His Man
Seth Meyers joked that the vice president had to “choose between the Constitution and a sleazy mafia don cold-calling election officials illegally, begging for votes like a telemarketer.”
0
Late Night Returns in Time for Another Perfect Trump Call
Just as the hosts’ holiday break was ending, President Trump asked Georgia’s secretary of state to “find” some more votes for him.
0
Watch Jimmy Kimmel Target Trump’s ‘Perfect’ Georgia Call
Just as the hosts’ holiday break was ending, President Trump asked Georgia’s secretary of state to “find” some more votes for him.
0
Late Night Compares Trump Health Adviser, Paul Alexander, to a Comic Book Villain
The former Health and Human Services adviser’s leaked emails encouraged herd immunity to deal with the pandemic, writing of Americans, “We want them infected.”
0
Some Republicans Finally Face ‘Their Biggest Fear: Reality,’ Colbert Says
Mitch McConnell’s congratulating Joe Biden on his victory in the election was big news among late-night hosts like Stephen Colbert.
0
Late Night Is Ready to Take Jabs
“That’s right, people all across America are lining up for shots,” Jimmy Fallon said on Monday. “Normally, when that happens here in December, we call it SantaCon.”
0
Jimmy Fallon: Trump’s Hanukkah Party Was a ‘Festival of Lies’
“Even the dreidel was looking at Trump like, ‘Damn, this guy spins more than I do,’” Fallon joked on Wednesday.
0
Trevor Noah: Trump Takes Another ‘L’ Trying to ‘Unlose’ the Election
“Not only did they shut this case down, but they shut it down in just 34 minutes,” Noah said of the Supreme Court. “They didn’t even pretend that they were going to consider it.”
0
Late-Night Hosts Celebrate ‘V-Day’ in Britain
Stephen Colbert and others riffed on 90-year-old Margaret Keenan and 81-year-old William Shakespeare, the first recipients of Pfizer’s coronavirus vaccine in a mass inoculation program.
0
Late Night Lampoons Giuliani, ‘America’s Sprayer’
“Sadly, this Covid test is the only positive thing to come out of Rudy Giuliani in four years,” Jimmy Kimmel joked on Monday.
0
Late Night: Vaccinating Ex-Presidents Is Hardly Must-See TV
Barack Obama, George W. Bush and Bill Clinton offered to take a coronavirus vaccine on camera. Jimmy Kimmel isn’t worried about losing viewers to that program.
0
Who’ll Be Pardoned for What? Stephen Colbert Invites You to Guess
Colbert made a game out of the speculation about presidential pardons: “You have to match the person to their crime, and there are no wrong answers.”
0
Stephen Colbert Says Bill Barr Will Be Missed
Barr said the Justice Department had not found voter fraud on a scale that could change election results. “Fraud on a scale — also known as the president’s annual physical,” Colbert joked Tuesday.
0
Late Night Reels as Joe Biden Gets the Boot, Too
“Someone check who that dog voted for,” Trevor Noah said after the president-elect fractured his foot while playing with his German shepherd.
0
Trump Brought Back Michael Flynn for the Finale, Fallon Says
“Seriously, there’s a name from the past,” Jimmy Fallon said of Flynn on Wednesday. “Even Michael Flynn was like, ‘Damn, I totally forgot about Michael Flynn.’”
0
Jimmy Kimmel Rags on Trump for His Randy Quaid Retweets
“Let’s just say he makes Gary Busey look like Dr. Fauci,” Kimmel said of the pro-Trump actor after the president retweeted five of his posts on Tuesday.
0
Late Night Won’t Let Trump’s Legal Team Forget Sidney Powell So Easily
Stephen Colbert said the disavowed lawyer and conspiracy theorist had been invited to a news conference last week by mistake, joking, “They meant to invite Sidney Powell Total Landscaping.”
0
Giuliani Got a Bad Batch of ‘Just for Henchmen’ Hair Dye, Colbert Says
“Remind me, is it a good sign when your lawyer starts melting?” Stephen Colbert joked after Rudy Giuliani appeared to sweat hair dye during a news conference.
0
Working for Trump Ends in Getting Fired or Getting Covid, Kimmel Says
President Trump fired Christopher Krebs, a senior cybersecurity official, via Twitter on Tuesday. “Usually to get rid of Krebs, Trump uses a little comb and some medicated shampoo,” Jimmy Kimmel joked.
0
Jimmy Kimmel Calls Giuliani the ‘Gift That Keeps on Grifting’
“I guess this explains why Trump has been passing the MAGA hat around, asking his fans to donate to his legal defense fund,” Kimmel said of Rudy Giuliani’s alleged request to be paid $20,000 a day.
0
Trump Counts Crowd’s Size Using ‘MAGA Math,’ Says Stephen Colbert
“Ten thousand, a million — it’s just how they count,” Colbert said of Saturday’s Million MAGA March. “You round up for marches, you round down for Covid deaths.”
0
Trump’s Legacy Is Already Tarnished, Stephen Colbert Says
The “Late Show” host said President Trump’s refusal to concede the election was the least of his transgressions: “It’s like finding out Jeffrey Dahmer illegally parked in handicapped spots — bad, but the ledger’s pretty full. And so’s the freezer.”
0
Jimmy Kimmel: Trump Is a Reality Show Host Who Can’t Accept Reality
“Republicans are handling the president with kid gloves because those are the only gloves that fit him,” Kimmel joked of President Trump’s refusal to concede to Joe Biden.
0
Seth Meyers Celebrates Election Results Coming Up Biden
“You know you were a bad president when people were celebrating an old white centrist like he was the sunset at Burning Man,” the “Late Night” host joked of President Trump’s loss.
0